There are so many things – music, poetry or whatever – I don’t understand. I just can’t keep up with my brain but still I enjoy them very much. Those pretty weird lyrics from Florence e. g. It is more like I feel them rather than cognitively understand. I understand with my heart. And it is enough. I can just go with the flow and its beauty lies in its mystery.

To avoid repeating myself all the time by praising Florence + The Machine today I chose Lykke Li.


I have no idea what this girl is doing in this video but from yesterday on – when I found this song – I just couldn’t stop listening to it. Clearly she is beautiful although I’m not really concentrating on the visuals and her voice is distinctive.

I could imagine the tune in an american bank robbing movie, a Bonnie and Clyde theme.. and for the lyrics I have many interpretations (from the fashionable vampire theme “I’m staying seventeen”, to an encounter with the Mafia “they won’t let me go, no”).


During the day I didn’t think about it though. I listened and listened and listened and any time it stopped I replayed it because I felt empty without it.

I think I’m addicted.


Photography and Me

It is a funny story. I wish I could say that we’ve had a long and balanced (or passionate) relationship throughout the past ten years or more. Maybe it is true.

We had a really balanced platonic relationship, no serious touching.

I received a fully automatic Nikon film camera for my high school graduation (2003) which was marvellous at the time when the digital cameras were too expensive and their quality was too bad to spend even a penny on it (or a fillér).

After finishing university I received another camera, a digital one this time. It even had some features and that nice big optical zoom I could play with that for a while. (Not for long though because it broke down after the guarantee had expired…)

But I had been planning that I would come to the UK and I would study photography, first the language of course, but then when I had some money I would definitely go to a course.

Well, God had other plans with me… until now. I hope at least that He doesn’t mind it now…

I borrowed my Dad’s old film camera, a Zenit ET which is almost 20 years old, and bought a book ‘for any cameras’ because (there’s no automatic setting on it plus) I sooooo wanted to learn how to make those ‘blurry at the back’ pictures and couldn’t afford a digital SLR (and I find it more romantic anyway).

So here I was enjoying my fabulous book until I got to the point: and now put down the book and grab your camera (it was even emphasizing: ‘do it because it is very important that you understand this, bastard!!!!’), look in the viewfinder and see how things change when you adjust the shutter speed…

I was looking, but nothing… of course nothing…

On the next page there was a photo of what I was supposed to see, how those digital numbers and signs were changing… So now I have no idea what should I see on mine instead.

At least in theory it seemed so logical. It’s not like I’m against challenges or anything. And there was photography before the digital era as well. So I can learn it too, right? Even if I’m being “blond” about it.

“you’ve gotten into my bloodstream”

The quote is from a Stateless song, Bloodstream, which I’ve loved ever since I first heard it.

I thought it was romantic and dramatic and it is a kind of a song that my friend describes as “I’m gonna split my wrists.” So, perfect for me. (Although I’ve never considered suicide yet. And I’m not planning to either. Just to make things clear. So no worries.)

And then. I watched Waiting for forever, again, the other day and there was a scene in it when one of the characters shares his concerns that this metaphor (getting into someone’s bloodstream) is rather a disgusting idea and asks a lady for her opinion:

“What would you say if he (*husband) came to you one day and he told you that in his dreams he sucks you in his lungs and at that point you go into his bloodstream. You are actually and physically inside of his blood, inside of his heart.. chambers and valves as such.. how that make you feel?”


And although the lady was mesmerised by this thought I prefer not think about it this way. Or any other ways.. I just concentrate on the music and let the lyrics flow through me without paying attention what and where flows actually.

Paint what you hear

Have you ever thought of drawing or painting a music album?

Well, I haven’t until I was given the task to do nothing but listen to an album and if I like I can draw or paint some images that come to mind. I probably don’t have to say that I cannot paint neither can I draw but it was not the point.

I chose Florence + The Machine and their Ceremonials, of course, but I thought that I would just sit still, listen and do no painting (since I can’t..).

But then the magic happened. After the first half of the first song (Only If For A Night) I took my highlighters that were lying around me (with no purpose) and started to make green lines, then orange then yellow and the picture was making itself.

Here it is: Florence Spectrum

I know I probably won’t be able to sell it and become a billionaire and I also know that your five year old niece can do the same even better but who cares I did it! I actually listened and did what I felt. And it was great!

And since it is the first day of 2012 I wish you a delightful new year with lots of colours and nice surprises!