After a not very productive weekend I was about to give up my NaNo. I already had a story, longer than I’d ever written. Then came Monday, when all day I tried to convince myself, that I still did well, even if I didn’t reach the fifty thousand. Of course I wasn’t happy about it, but I thought at least I tried. Then at about seven PM I continued writing. And it came easy and effortless and I managed to catch up a little bit. The next few days went the same way, I struggled a bit on Thursday but at least I wasn’t behind the target any more. And Friday came, the last day of NaNo, when I only had 1200 words to complete the task and reach the fifty thousand. I did it at about seven PM. I was happy and I felt so relieved, so light as if I lost at least ten kilos in that second, when I saw my Open Office word count.
I was so eager to upload it to the NaNo site to be announced as a winner, but as soon as I did upload it, I realized, there was something wrong. It showed only 48757 words. Less than I had the day before. I tried again and again and it gave me the same answer: I didn’t finish yet! I felt betrayed, that the NaNo Gods weren’t with me any more, that they didn’t want me to win. But I wanted to win!
So I sat back again, Champaign still in the bottle, not splashed all over my room and started to type. It was awful. The worst writing I’ve ever done, but I didn’t care, it was my revenge on the NaNo site.
I was tired, bloody tired, my back was aching and my eyes were flowing out when I finally reached 50005 words. I WON!
Still writing. Still haven’t given up. I’m at 44488 words which means with a 2000 each day I can do it just in time. I can do it. I can do it. I can do it. I can do it.
When day ten started I had the feeling that I was going to fall a bit behind the target and unfortunately I wasn’t wrong. In the early morning I still managed to write a bit over four hundred words but then that was it. I had to go to work and after eight hours running up and down (because everyone decided to have drink-in coffees and to buy chocolate) I was reeeeallly tired when I got on the train. I almost fell asleep so didn’t write. It was a busy evening with a long night out. I know I’m not supposed to go out while nanoing, but common it was my boyfriend’s birthday! Today, I tried to do some catching up, but wasn’t very successful as I rather spent time with him but still managed to write 1400 or so. So next week I guess I’m gonna have to extend my daily targets to 2000. I’m getting tired and the to-do list is just piling up. Still I don’t want to give up. I’m much more stubborn than that!
WOW, 10000 words are done. We’re almost a week in the competition and I’m still standing. My story’s getting a bit spooky with scary ghosts lingering around. I’m not sure how they came in picture or what is their intention, but let’s hope I will find out eventually.
When I opened a new Open Office document this morning, I didn’t think I would almost double the daily word count today. I was afraid that as soon as I run out of the first ideas (I didn’t plan the whole plot, only how I would start) I would be doomed. But I’m not! There are new ones coming so I can see the next step of the journey. If it keeps coming like this, I will be happy.
Now I’m off to get some sleep and tomorrow morning relaxed and fresh I could start writing again.
So, one week to go. I have seven (SEVEN) days to find out what to write about. Plenty of time.
The truth is, I’m spending my well deserved two weeks holiday at home, in Hungary.
It is NOT the same as being in London, I have practically nothing to do (except going to dentist (ouch), to post office, to wellness-weekend and zoo (yeay), getting an oily thai massage from my Mum (<3), taking some autumnal pictures and meeting some relatives). Which means I cannot actually concentrate on my novel, can I?
I’m travelling back on the 3rd of November, on the third day of NaNoWriMo when I will have to have written a bit more than 3000 words. I cannot start with a big delay either, especially because my chances to write 50 000 words in a month are quite tiny. And I don’t want to give it up before I even start, so instead of going to the dentist today, I’m going to start to plan my novel! (Okay, don’t worry, I’ll do it after…)
This is the part, when I tell everyone, that I signed up for NaNoWriMo (National Novel Writing Month). Which is a writing challenge in November (every November) and writers, who are crazy OR good enough to enter (I count myself to the first group) have to write a Novel of 50000 words within 30 days.
And why am I declaring it? Because even though I really doubt that I can get anywhere near to 50k but what if I can? What if there’s a story within me as well? And what if the guilt and shame I would feel when I gave up after a week, will prevent me of giving up at all?
My goal is to make it through the 30 days, writing as much as I possibly can and if that doesn’t make the 50k mark, only 20k, then who cares, I did what I could, I’m going to be happy and proud, and I’m going to be a Winner, no matter what everyone else says. And there’s always going to be a next year, if I still feel like writing.